Soccer Mom???

Some background to start: My oldest played soccer last year for the first time. She started the season loving it, but by the end the excitement was gone and she really didn't seem to be enjoying herself. So it was with hesitation that I signed up for this year's season after she insisted that she LOVES soccer.

Last week was her first week, but she wasn't feeling well and we missed. The decision not to go last week started a chain of events that I came to regret tonight at her first game.

Before dinner I decided it was best to get her into her uniform and give all her gear the once over. Being a lover of princesses, and all things girly she was quickly in tears over having to take off her skirt to put on the green jersey and black shorts. In her eyes they are ugly and what boys where so she was having none of it. Next the shoes, shin pads and socks were a battle. The socks fit me, the pads were cutting the shoelaces were too tight - you name it, it was point of misery for her! In the back of my mind I was thinking it all would have been so much easier if my husband had done this last week, and if she had seen the other girls on her team wearing the same stuff.

Next dinner was a struggle. She didn't want to eat, she wanted to go, then she didn't want to go because she wanted eat. Eventually, she admitted that she was scared but couldn't tell my why exactly. We had a long chat about how new things are scary sometimes and finally we managed to get dinner finished.

Soccer starts and for the first bit all is well. Then I can see things changing. She starts wandering over for a drink. She is walking now instead of running. Next thing I know she is barely paying attention because the drawstring in her shorts is FAR more interesting. Convincing her to give it one more go she runs back onto the field and has an awkward sideways collision with a team mate. She took an elbow to the collarbone and was instantly in tears. I don't blame her, but the look on her face said it all. A look of I hate this! The final straw - it was our turn to bring team snack this week but I didn't know because we missed last week and the coach forgot to tell me when we spoke on the phone. I of course looked like the idiot parent who can't keep it together as my kid is crying and the all the other kids are asking a million times why there isn't any snack. To add insult to injury my daughter was heartbroken that she missed her "turn" to share snack and wanted to know when it would be her turn again. "Only one turn! Ahhhh, Mom!!!"

On the drive home I asked her if she liked soccer, did she have fun, was she looking forward to going back next week and so on. She answered yes every time, but with one of those grudgingly, no energy, this sucks kind of a yes. So here is the challenge: if your child is eager to do something beforehand, but they clearly don't enjoy doing it what do you do? Do you encourage them because you want to support all of their endeavours? Do you side step their interest by redirecting their energy to another activity? Or, do you just shut'em down, tell to try something else? I never want to discourage her, but I also want to encourage her to participate in activities she genuinely enjoys. And, I still don't understand why she wants to play so badly when she obviously would rather be doing a million other things! I'm not sure I will ever understand how her little brain works!