Parenting Optional?

I often wondering if I'm a strict, hard-ass type parent or if other parents think rules, supervision and consequences are optional; especially, when I observe the parenting of children around me. I'm not passing judgment; I just don't always understand the choices that other parents make. Here's what I mean:

1) Last Friday evening, and many other evenings for that matter, I heard young children playing in the common area behind my townhouse. I looked and sure enough two boys who are 6 and 7 years-old were playing outside in the pitch black and there was no parent to be seen. It was 9:50 p.m.! My girls were in bed and sound asleep by 8:00 p.m. My first thought was that bedtime at their homes must be very late by the time they are called in, bathed, p.j'ed and ready for bed. My second thought was they had spent all day at school and their little brains still need 12 hours of sleep. Third thought, you never know who is wondering around in a townhouse complex after hours! Not that where we live is unsafe, but there are people walking pets, University students having parties and lots of other people who walking through because there is a public access trail that cuts through the complex. The craziest thing is that I hear these little guys outside late into the evening many nights, and not just on weekends. What are the parents of these children thinking?

2) The little boy who lives next door to us, one of the same boys from scenario #1, has just turned 7 years-old. By provincial law he is required to be in a booster seat until he is 8 years-old or meets the size requirements, which he doesn't currently. And yet, he usually rides in the car without a booster seat and even without a seat belt. I recently was loading my kids into our car while he was being picked up by a family friend to go somewhere. I hear the friend shout to his mom about needing his car seat, but after a discussion back and forth the friend said, "Oh, no big deal! I'm not going far and I can drive slow." WHAT??? Are these people insane? (Okay, I guess I am being judgmental.) Driving slow sounds like a sure fire way to prevent another speeding idiot from slamming into your car! In my mind the purpose of a car seat isn't necessarily to protect your children from your own driving, but to protect them from the driving of others. You know, people around you who you have no control over? Another strange decision!

3) Soda in a bottle! Yes, you read correctly. More than once I have seen and spoken to parents who give their little ones soda in bottle. In fact just this week I watched a parent open a can of orange soda, pour half into a bottle for a child that looked to be about 18 months and give the rest to her preschooler. Since when did it become common practice and part of a healthy, well-balanced diet to give babies soda? I guess I missed that bulletin. My almost 5 year-old hasn't even had soda. We have given her Ginger Ale for an upset tummy, but she hates the bubbles and usually refuses to drink it. I can't imagine what the carbonation would be like inside a bottle, sucked through a silicone nipple and then in a tiny baby tummy! Crazy, yet again!

So again, I find myself wondering when did parenting become optional. Over the years, decades, and generations has parenting become so lax that all that is important is that we feed or children something, get them to school (most of the time), and give them free range to do as they please in order to keep them happy? What happened to safety first, routines, 7:30 bedtimes and family dinners? I feel like things were different when I was growing up, or at least at my house they were. I hope that if my girls become parents they value their children for their developing brains, bodies and spirits. That they realize their children are people - little people with the right to good health, safety, and happiness. These things are rights after all and not luxuries. If you have children parenting is not optional!