"The Tightrope Walker"

"The Tightrope Walker" by Jean-Louis Forain

Thursday, October 14, 2010

The Baby Bully.

Molly is a bully.  Yep, I said it.  She really and truly is a bully.  Yesterday for example, we had only been up for a half hour and she had already made her big sister cry three times.  First, she deliberately picked up a baby doll, walked over to her sister and then slammed it across her face.  I know you think I'm crazy, but her actions were very intentional and clearly she was hoping for a reaction.  Sophie cried and Molly satisfied by the reaction walked away.  Of course I jumped in, made everyone kiss and moved Molly to the other side of the room.  I thought I had distracted Molly so I went on getting things ready to leave for the day, but Molly saw her opening.  For the second time in less than ten minutes Molly whacked Sophie over the face with the doll.  So doll went up high, Molly again was diverted to another activity and Sophie was kissed better.  Again attempting to get bags packed and everyone out the door I dropped everything I was doing at the sound of Sophie's screams for the third time.  Molly had twisted her fat little fingers into Sophie's crazy curls and was yanking and pulling with all her might.  Every time Sophie yelped Molly tugged again.  All of this in the first half hour of my day! 

Thankfully the babysitter reported a quiet and uneventful day with no more battles, but back at home all hell broke loose again at dinner time.  The short version - Sophie ended up with lovely baby teeth marks in her back.  Ouch!  Poor kid gets attacked when she least expects it!

JD and I are bewildered.  We never experienced this type of behaviour with Sophie; I suppose because she had no one to pick on.  Even stranger though is that Molly has the guts to be so aggressive towards someone bigger and stronger than her.  Thankfully, Sophie screams and cries which brings us running rather than taking matters into her own hands and fighting back.  I find myself wondering how much more Sophie can take and if she will reach a breaking point that causes her to hit, bite or pull back.  I obviously want to put an end to this behaviour so we don't reach that point, but I just don't know what to do. 

Clearly the old-fashioned divert and distract isn't working, time-out isn't an option at this age and Molly is too little to understand the concept of hurting someone.  We've told Sophie that she needs to do her best to move away from Molly as soon as she starts being mean, to keep her hair out of Molly's reach and to always tell us when Molly hurts her.  But, at the same time it is clear that Sophie expects some sort of justice.  She doesn't understand why Molly isn't punished in the same way as her. After all if she hurt Molly she would sit in time out and likely face other consequences, but here is Molly pulling her hair and then being offered a toy to distract her.  So, Molly the Baby Bully needs to be reigned in.  How?  I'm not sure, but the sooner the better!  Ideas???

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